I. TRUE or FALSE: The earth is an motionless, circular disc,
covered with a large, solid dome
that has windows in it so that rain
can fall on the earth.
Yahweh says TRUE. (Genesis 1:7-8; 7:11; Ps. 104:5; Matthew 4:8)
Fifth-Grader says FALSE.
II. TRUE or FALSE: Stars are smaller than the earth and can fall
down on the surface of the earth.
Yahweh says TRUE. (Revelation 8:10) Fifth-Grader says FALSE.
III. TRUE or FALSE: Insects have four legs.
Yahweh says TRUE. (Leviticus 11:20-22) Fifth-Grader says FALSE.
IV. TRUE or FALSE: Snails dissolve as they move from place
to place.
Yahweh says TRUE. (Psalm 58:8) Fifth-Grader says FALSE.
V. TRUE or FALSE: Hares and rabbits are ruminates, like cows,
sheep, and goats.
Yahweh says TRUE. (Deuteronomy 14:7) Fifth-Grader says FALSE.
VI. TRUE or FALSE: What a pregnant animal sees will affect the color
and pattern of its offspring's coat.
Yahweh says TRUE. (Genesis 30:31-43) Fifth-Grader says FALSE.
VII. TRUE or FALSE: Plants never have separate male and female
forms.
Yahweh says TRUE. ((Genesis 1:11-12) Fifth-Grader says FALSE.
ALL OF THE ABOVE TEST ITEMS ARE FALSE.
If anyone still believes that the planet earth and
the rest of the universe are some sort of hemispheric
snow globe, God love you. Grasshoppers, roaches,
ants, etc. all have six legs. If you have the time, follow
a snail around as it lays down a mucus path. It won't
melt unless you saute it in garlic and butter. Rabbits don't
regurgitate their food, but they do eat a specific type of
their feces. The Hebrew word for vomit is different
from the Hebrew word for shit. Color and pattern of an animal's coat
are determined by its genes, not by what its mother looked at. Facts
discovered by a Roman Catholic monk in the 19th Century. But the
communists, God bless them, were devoted to this article of faith well
into the 20th Century, using the fabrications of Lysenko during
Stalinist rule.
Finally, birds do it, bees do it, and even some plants do it. Most
plants have a unisexual form. But many plants need separate male
and female forms in order to reproduce. For example, some figs
and--of all things--Christmas holly.
Maybe because He was self-taught?
Tuesday, December 27, 2011
Thursday, December 22, 2011
The Seven Deadly Flip Flops by Jesus in the Bible
I. Jesus Flip Flops on Who Are His Sheep
Jesus was against preaching to the Gentiles (Matthew 10:5-6;
Matthew 15:24) before He was for it (Matthew 28:19).
II. Jesus Flip Flops on Changing the Letter of Mosaic Law
Jesus was against changing the smallest precept of Mosaic
Law (Matthew 5:17-19) before He changed it (Mark 7:18-19).
III. Jesus Flip Flops on Peace
Jesus was for peace (Matthew 5:9) before He was
against it (Matthew 10:34).
IV. Jesus Flip Flops on Forgiveness
Jesus was against absolute forgiveness (Matthew 12:31;
Mark 3:28-29; Luke 12:10) before He was for it, giving the
power of absolute forgiveness to His apostles (John 20:22-23).
V. Jesus Flip Flops on Calling People Fools
Jesus was against calling people fools under penalty
of damnation (Matthew 5:22) before He was
for it (Matthew 23:17).
VI. Jesus Flip Flops on Grounds for Divorce
Jesus was for grounds for divorce (Matthew 5:32) before He
was against grounds for divorce (Mark 10:7-9).
VII. Jesus Flip Flops on Public Display of Devotion
Jesus was for public display of devotion (Matthew 5:16)
before He was against it (Matthew 6:1; 5-6).
There's no truth, no hope, no honesty in the Holey Bible:
all perjury, all forsworn, all naught, all dissembling.
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